I tried using my get out of jail free card but the CVV on the back was Roman Numerals for eleven

We hit it off: she’d declawed her cats and I’d plucked my cacti’s needles

If you feel like you’ve been getting away with something you’ve probably been cheating yourself

The only ones Who antisemites hate more than Je… Are Jews who defend themselves There is a name For their belief system:

If you can convince people that something is inevitable they will behave as if it’s already happened making its eventuality a non-event

Everybody worships something But that something is amiss Hero worship is one thing But heroin’s an abyss Invisible from the One Ring

In the past walking into a cathedral made you feel small Now it makes you feel fat

Our glass Is an hourglass And whether it is half-full Or half-empty Time is running out

You can’t prove that God exists But even if you could People would just say Correlation does not imply causati…

The brain is pattern-seeking And it will keep making the same m… Until it sees the pattern for itse…

My astrologer credited her work wi… for the discovery of a thirteenth… Jello the Jellyfish which shares the sting of my erstw… but is distinguished by a spineles…

You’ll know you’re talking to God When He doesn’t talk back Yet you still have your answer

When I was a kid we thought the end of the world was coming any minute via The Button Instead it came a little later

Only a poet Can accurately describe anything More accurately A poet can describe anything Except himself

People understand that their socia… depends on their phone but they wrongly believe that the existential question at h… is the familiar