At the end of life you can either say I brought it or I bought it

My wife is a lot like God If God weren’t perfect Like Him, she’s my toughest criti… But also my fiercest champion

An overreaction used to tell you who was guilty Now it’s just another link in

X marks the spot where cyborgs will receive their o– ver-the-air updates

Pressure is wanting it for someone else Passion is wanting it

All behavior is purposeful and all behavior is self-serving until you realize that all behavior is self-serving which is when you find out what ha…

This is a much simpler question than What does a woman want? Hamas wants to kill all Jews in Israel

Yes, humans suck– that’s a universal The reason we haven’t been able to fix it is that being a human doesn’t suck for eve…

The usual cruelty Is having multiple children And enforcing a hierarchy In order to keep the peace Unusual cruelty

People will only tell the truth when they think they can get away with it For example, perjury laws only wor… by publicly threatening jail time

God is hard to know– That’s how you know He is God And how He knows you care Whereas the devil doesn’t care How you found him

Like many people I have dreams in which I’m flying but in mine I’m always flying

By preserving crucial memories Your amygdala prepares for the fut… Through understanding the past By digging strategic memory holes The internet controls the present

You can’t quite see it but Moe also pokes Curly right in his third eye