The only way to avoid giving the man who has everything more of the same is to give him nothing

She went to law school; I bet it all on brick ov– en pita and lost

Every strength comes with a weakne… So, when a recent headline said “Is Xi Jinping all-powerful or we… it demonstrated that our greatest… is the ability to ask a stupid que…

Desire is a tautology rendering each of us a failed ouroboros as dogs chasing our own tails

The first half of life: Did I say that? The second half of life: I did say that The end of life:

Less self-interest is in your best interest except on Pinterest

Insanity is thinking you can ever get what you want and devoting your life to getting it

God knows that the only thing you can give the man who has everything is another chance

You can’t put a square peg in a round hole but you can put a JPEG in a memory hole

When words fail you’re getting close to the truth But we’re just about to talk ourselves into

While others await the second coming my own second shortcoming (the first– keeping the peace

In days gone by we said you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink In these more opportune times it’s widely understood that

Think about how much control they… with a made up version of eternal damnation Then consider how much freedom you’ll be left with

People understand that their socia… depends on their phone but they wrongly believe that the existential question at h… is the familiar

I wasn’t born to follow mainly because I would never go through a red light