It all clicked for me when I realized that Hebrew School Is a party school

Life is a talent show where most everyone is doing bad versions of easy impressions

When you have to share everything else you can still hog the blame pie

The devil is ingenious: Since our minds are inside the min… The devil has designs on us Uploading our minds to the cloud– i.e. To hell–

What I lack in subtlety I make up for in volume

The difference between God and human beings Is that God gives you what you deserve Which is always what you need

This is a much simpler question than What does a woman want? Hamas wants to kill all Jews in Israel

When Plan A is not having a plan Plan B is not having an exit strategy

The biggest reason I ever did any… Was always my ego Even as a part of me insisted There must be something bigger That part, the heart

Unlike the Americans and the Engl… who are divided by a common langua… the Americans and the Parisians are divided by a common symptom: disappointment

You would think doing well on social media would give you strength in numbers but you only end up

I can’t guess your age but I can guess your age when you got that tattoo

When life gives white people lemon… they make ginger tea lemonade wit…

Keep your friends close your enemies closer and your neighbor closest

Ever since I got my first smartphone it feels like I’m visiting a museum and all the decent human beings