Charles Bukowski

Women: 45

Tammie came by that night. She appeared to be high on uppers. “I want some champagne,” she said.

“All right,” I said.

I handed her a twenty.

“Be right back,” she said, walking out the door.

Then the phone rang. It was Lydia. “I just wondered how you were doing. ...”

“Things are all right.”

“Not here. I’m pregnant.”

“What?”

“And I don’t know who the father is.”

“Oh?”

“You know Dutch, the guy who hangs around the bar where I’m working now?”

“Yes, old Baldy.”

“Well, he’s really a nice guy. He’s in love with me. He brings me flowers and candy. He wants to marry me. He’s been real nice. And one night I went home with him. We did it.”

“All right.”

“Then there’s Barney, he’s married but I like him. Of all the guys in the bar he’s the only one who never tried to put the make on me. It fascinated me. Well, you know, I’m trying to sell my house. So he came over one afternoon. He just came by. He said he wanted to look the house over for a friend of his. I let him in. Well, he came at just the right time. The kids were in school so I let him go ahead. . . . Then one night this stranger came into the bar late. He asked me togo home with him. I told him no. Then he said he just wanted to sit in my car with me, talk to me. I said all right. We sat in the car and talked. Then we shared a joint. Then he ”kissed me. That kiss did it. If he hadn’t kissed me I wouldn’t have done it. Now I’m pregnant and I don’t know who. I’ll have to wait and see who the child looks like.”

“All right, Lydia, lots of luck.”

“Thanks.”

I hung up. A minute passed and then the phone rang again. It was Lydia. “Oh,” she said, “I wondered how you were doing?” “About the same, horses and booze.”

“Then everything’s all right with you?”

“Not quite.”

“What is it?”

“Well, I sent this woman out for champagne. . . .”

“Woman?”

“Well, girl, really . . .”

“A girl?”

“I sent her out with $20 for champagne and she hasn’t come back. I think I’ve been taken.”

“Chinaski, I don’t want to hear about your women. Do you understand that?”

“All right.”

Lydia hung up. There was a knock on the door. It was Tammie. She’d come back with the champagne and the change.

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